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[其他] robertzai老师帮助改作文专贴【师傅外出,暂停】

本主题由 benz2015 于 2008-8-5 15:13 关闭

robertzai老师帮助改作文专贴【师傅外出,暂停】

大家一个楼层只放一篇作文 这样其他的楼层的朋友就不用等太久了

10楼 done (governmental investment in outer space or basic needs on the earth?  15#; teachers should be paid according to how much their students learn   24#; find a roommate: wait by chance or find one on purpose  25#; get advice from people around you or explore life by yourself? 26#)
12楼 done  (efficiency of learning with or without a teacher  16#)
18楼 done  (how to tell truth from the false  36#)
20楼 one piece done  (harms of telephone and e-mail in terms of communication  42#)
22楼 done (buildings: appearance or function  43#)
23楼  done (part-time jobs as teenagers  44#)
27楼 done (the construction of a theater nearby  45#)
29楼 done (business or farming research  48# 非常非常出色的文章)
34楼 done  (the role of artistic courses  50#)
35楼  done (attention to celebrities: acceptable or not?  51#)
37楼 done (longer working hours, higher pay and less time with families  vs.  shorter working hours, less pay and more time with families  58#)
38楼
39楼
40楼
41楼
54楼
55楼

                                                                                               
Jimmy 插一句,作文一定要自己看过了,改过了,再发上来。这样对大家都好。不是吗?
写的乱七八糟的,一看就是没有用心的,或者字数太少的,robertzai老师可以不看。
老师的时间也是有限的,请有心人珍惜这个机会。

[ 本帖最后由 benz2015 于 2008-8-5 15:13 编辑 ]
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美丽动人的更新
樱花树下 和 喜帖街 都好好听

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梯队有作业,雷锋叔叔去各个梯队看看吧。

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好劳力,这个得抓住,哈哈哈,好多人发作文呢,你看着改吧

尽量把 帮别人改过作文的人 的作文优先考虑

不少人上来扔篇文章就走的。。。。
纯粹的幼稚是快乐,纯粹的成熟也是快乐~
不快乐是因为我们既失去了纯粹的幼稚,又没到达纯粹的成熟~
不纯粹的成熟就是痛苦~
我倒希望幼稚一些,无知带来的快乐是幸福~

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不支持不行。

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不相信楼主还能相信谁。支持。
无敌神猫TOP  CAT    WHO WHAT WHERE WHY HOW

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强烈支持~ 肉丸子   

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肉老师去我们10组吧

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哈哈,看到老师的影子感觉真爽。
Your potential, our concern!

欢迎加入蓝鹰计划这一平凡而伟大的活动--助中国的IBT奋斗者一臂之力。SLS61-01B0-TGFBA-NLCXGMHA-BDFC

我们应该努力的学习,努力的奋斗,为了理想,历经千辛万苦,希望失望希望失望希望失望反反复复挣扎,依然不低下高贵的头,这样才能对世界说, My dream is what I get.
                                                               --Jimmy


分手不叫失去,她结婚了,而且还没有告诉你,才是真正的失去

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麻烦改一下啊,谢谢啊

十分感谢
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哇靠~~~必须支持老肉啊,太雷锋了~~~~
人的梦想是不会终结的!!!~!~! 有朝一日,我会有自己的铁血战士小分队的!!!~!~
GRE备考全攻略~~~
我的生活~~
日本VR界的传奇乐队---X-JAPAN

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不知道托福作文算不算,先谢谢无私的robertzai!

17. Some people think that they can learn better by themselves than with a teacher. Others think that it is always better to have a teacher. Which do you prefer Use specific reasons to develop your essay.


Which career is the most respectable in the world? To me, the answer is a teacher. There is general debate nowadays on the issue of whether people can learn better by themselves than with a teacher. People in growing numbers are beginning to accept self-studying. They believe that it can save tuition and make the study schedule flexible without a teacher. Wonderful though the advantages that self-studying enjoys are, they can not compute with the benefits that a teacher brings, when efficiency of learning and the extent of knowledge they learn is taken into account.

People who are being taught, as a matter of fact, acquire the knowledge and skill more efficiently. Apprentices learn the key skill from their masters directly and systematically. They can pass the process "trial and error" as other individual learners must undergo. Even if they made mistakes, their master would correct them immediately, at the same time, individual learners may not realize there were mistakes. It likes that the apprentices run in the straight way to the goal but others do in the zigzag ones. In school, why there are teachers? Teachers do not only the same thing as masters do, but also supervise the students. Most young students are apt to being appealed too much by things other than studying, such as computer games, internet, fictions, etc. It's teachers that advise the students back to the right route of learning. Thus, compared to individual learners, people with teachers study in a more efficient way.

In addition to efficiency, people can benefit from learning more from their teachers that are absent in books. For example, in my experience of studying, various kinds of irregular skills can I obtain from my teacher to solve problems in many aspectss. They were interesting and practical, such as a fast algorithm to calculate mathematics problems, a combined method of remembering English words. On the other hand, my teachers' personality affected me a lot. In most children learners' eyes, their teachers are as the same as saints. They like to imitate their teachers' behaves, speaks, moves etc. Undoubtedly, teachers do keep the best image to their students too.

Admittedly, people who study by themselves choose an economical way and enjoy the freedom to make flexible study plan. However, needn't they buy more materials for their learning without a teacher? Sometimes, the money spend on the materials is no less than the tuition. As I mentioned above, most young students are not as self-disciplined as they consider themselves on studying. Too flexible study schedules does the freedom induce. They can't completely confine themselves to the plan they make. In brief, the seeming advantages of self-studying mean nothing for most people.

From what has been discussed above, we could safely draw the conclusion that as people should learn with a teacher rather than by themselves. Only by leading by a teacher can people acquire knowledge in a efficient and practical way.

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我奈你 肉肉~
  请假了  

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#10 和 #12的朋友的作文已下载 争取明天发
美丽动人的更新
樱花树下 和 喜帖街 都好好听

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回复 10# sgpc_001 的贴子

第一篇
语言能力很强,虽然没有什么华丽的词藻,也没有很多高级的句型,但是简明扼要,读起来很顺畅,没有大的错误。
但我建议把逻辑整理一下,因为这篇文章,特别是第二段和第三段,哪些句子应该先写,那些句子应该慢写,自己动笔前应该心里有谱。线索必须清楚。另外,读这篇文章的时候我一直有一个很大的疑惑。你的观点是:必须研究外太空,因为研究外太空是为了满足人们的日常需求。那么,为什么不干脆把钱花在发展人们日常需求上呢?


[ 本帖最后由 robertzai 于 2008-4-12 12:05 编辑 ]
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美丽动人的更新
樱花树下 和 喜帖街 都好好听

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回复 12# luckymichael 的贴子

很不爽,只挑得到几个错误来改,不爽,不爽。
Just kidding,在太傻改了这么多作文,楼主可能是我改过的作文里面论证水平最高的。举的例子不生涩,但绝对一击即中。语言很干练。没有罗嗦的或者中式英语的毛病。如果硬要挑一个错误的话,就是把高中课本拿出来,把倒装句那章复习一下。因为文章里面出现了三个倒装句都用错了。

To Jimmy:
赶快把此人吸收进蓝鹰啊,是个大牛
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本帖最近评分记录
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樱花树下 和 喜帖街 都好好听

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引用:
原帖由 robertzai 于 2008-4-12 12:48 发表
很不爽,只挑得到几个错误来改,不爽,不爽。
Just kidding,在太傻改了这么多作文,楼主可能是我改过的作文里面论证水平最高的。举的例子不生涩,但绝对一击即中。语言很干练。没有罗嗦的或者中式英语的毛病。如果 ...
非常感谢robertzai 为我批改的作文啊,让我受益匪浅!至于你的评价真是过奖了,这篇文章因为用了一天的时间写,自己也一边参考别人的文章一边写的,都是东抄西抄的,呵呵。文章比较长,现在担心考试的时候根本不够时间写。

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哇 我也来凑凑热闹看看
我是蓝鹰NO.10的成员哦
组里的兄弟姐妹都很卖力,但偶尔还是希望老师也帮我看看

[ 本帖最后由 keysir 于 2008-4-12 19:47 编辑 ]
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回复 15# robertzai 的贴子

感谢感谢啊,希望能把其他三篇看一下啊,谢谢拉

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麻烦老师也帮我改下吧

我是13组成员,希望能得到老师的意见,谢谢啦
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回复 20# 谁与争峰 的贴子

一次少发点嘛

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