157．Studying at home by using technology or at traditional schools?
As the twenty-first century comes up, more and more people are soaking up within the ocean of new technologies. The most important technology that has made a big effect on the new society is attributed to the personal computer. Accordingly, as for which way sounds better for students to obtain more information—the first is traditional way for attending school and the second is studying by the new technology at home, I believe that the latter one is preferable to choice in the modern society for some reasons as follows.

If one person has a computer connected to the internet at home, it is more effective and efficient for one to obtain a lot of information that can not be fully realized contemporarily at school. It is undeniable that some technologies could surly built up the solid connection with some famous experts or professors online through the computer, the technology that allows student to view their teachers online with some awesome features such visions, sounds and life-like touches on the screen. Studying like telecommuting at home, students could share such fabulous technology available to study at home and it seems to be more effective and efficient than studying at school, since it do not cost your much time to rush into the crowed classes at school.

Without offering a bunch of dollar bills to school for education, one could also be educated well through the new technology at home. Statistically, the tuition fees for one studying in the university for 4 years increasingly boost up during recent years. On average, a student should be charged for 6000 yuan per year in China nowadays. It is quite urgent to develop some new ways to help those students whose parents can not support their payment throughout the university time to acquire same knowledge as being at school without being charged too much money. Now, the computer online technology is available to meet such requirement mentioned above.

Furthermore, although studying at home by new technology will lose some items that could only be obtained at school, it also could at most make up for such shortcomings with some charming soft wares on the computer. It is true that spending times studying with your friends at school would be a great experience. Generally the internet is regarded as a three dimontional device that could only imitate the real life. However, with the rapid revolution of new technology, I believe that one will feel the same environment while surfing the computer at home as studying at school coming soon in the future.

In conclusion, I believe that learning how to use new technology in the modern society for education or something else would be better for students to become a well-developed adult in the future. Without considering high tuition fees while getting the similar load of information as studying at school, modern students would be lucky enough to feel all these features that new technology brings to in today’s society.

本篇习作打完正好30分中，但用了7分中修改发现错误多多，有些以自己修改，其他的请帮忙看看

As the twenty-first century comes up(发生?), more and more people are soaking up within(没见过,直接soak in不好么?) the ocean of new technologies. The most important technology that has made a big effect on the new society is attributed to(?) the personal computer. Accordingly, as for which way sounds better for students to obtain more information(最终是这个目的么?)—the first(one) is (the)traditional way for(?) attending school and the second is studying by the new technology at home, I believe that the latter one is preferable to choice in the modern society for some reasons as follows(这句很混乱).

If one person has a computer connected to the internet at home, it is more effective and efficient for one(he or she) to obtain a lot of information that can not be fully realized(information be realized?) contemporarily(?) at school. It is undeniable that some technologies could surly built up the solid connection(谁与专家教授的连接?) with some famous experts or professors online through the computer, the technology that allows student to view(不当) their teachers online with some awesome( ) features such visions, sounds and life-like touches(是啥米?) on the screen. Studying like telecommuting at home(??), students could share such fabulous technology available to study at home and it(指代什么?) seems to be more effective and efficient than studying at school, since it do not cost your(u) much time to rush into the crowed classes at school.

Without offering(不当) a bunch of dollar bills to school for education, one could also be educated well through the new technology at home. Statistically, the tuition fees for one studying in the university for 4 years increasingly boost up during recent years. On average, a student should be charged for 6000 yuan per year in China nowadays. It is quite urgent to develop some new ways to help those students whose parents can not support their payment throughout the university time to acquire same knowledge as being at school without being charged too much money(lz你的这个句子让我想起了gre阅读,你又何必这么为难批卷的呢?). Now, the computer online technology(用information technology好不?) is available to meet such requirement mentioned above.

Furthermore, although studying at home by new technology will lose some items(道具?) that could only be obtained at school, it also could at most make up for such shortcomings with some charming soft wares(合在一起) on the computer. It is true that spending times(time) studying with your friends at school would be a great experience. Generally the internet is regarded as a three dimontional device(internet,device?) that could only imitate the real life. However, with the rapid revolution of new technology, I believe that one will feel the same environment while surfing the computer at home as studying at school coming soon in the future(什么东东coming soon?).

In conclusion, I believe that learning how to use new technology in the modern society for education or something else would be better for students to become a well-developed adult in the future. Without considering high tuition fees while getting the similar load of information as studying at school, modern students would be lucky enough to feel all these features that new technology brings to in today’s society.

还有好多错误改不过来了.lz我觉得复杂的句子和高级的单词如果不是掌握的很好最好先不要用~
干吧带,衣奴呀虾~

^_^，Holsety 真是细心！而且超级幽默！！

还有那么多错误啊，我要晕了，(falling down and banging my head against the wall till the blood oozes from the nose )

[ 本帖最后由 _paul_ 于 2006-12-27 22:43 编辑 ]

lz的文章写了接近500字.对咱们来说要保证这么多字还要控制错误有点苛刻了.要是逼我30分钟写篇500字的文章,估计我写出来的就得相当不成样子了.

引用:

原帖由 _paul_ 于 2006-12-27 22:34 发表
还有那么多错误啊，我要晕了，(falling down and banging my head against the wall till the blood oozes from the nose )

别灰心，慢慢来。
You gonna be ok!